whale jokes

Whale Jokes – Laughter Deep as the Ocean

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Diving into the deep blue sea of humor, we often find ourselves fishing for that perfect joke that will have everyone spouting laughter like a whale breaches the ocean’s surface.

But what is it about whale jokes that tickles our funny bone? Is it the sheer size of these gentle giants juxtaposed with the playfulness of a pun, or perhaps the way they echo our own social behaviors in a way that’s ripe for comedic twist?

With a splash of wit and a wave of humor, whale jokes come swimming into our conversations, offering a lighthearted escape from the day-to-day. They’re not just about the punchlines; they’re a clever conduit to learning about these magnificent creatures of the sea.

So, let’s dive right in—why do whale jokes make such a big splash in the ocean of humor? Let’s explore the depths of this fin-tastic world of jest, where every quip and pun is a treasure waiting to be discovered.

Best Whale Jokes & Puns

Best Whale Jokes & Puns

Why don’t whales use Facebook? They’re afraid of the net.

What’s a whale’s favorite TV show? Whale of Fortune!

How do whales like their sandwiches? Krill-ed cheese, please!

Why did the whale cross the ocean? To get to the other tide.

What do you call a pod of musical whales? An orca-stra.

How do whales make decisions? They flipper coin.

What’s a whale’s favorite greeting? Whale hello there!

Why did the whale love the comedian? He was krill-arious.

What’s a whale’s favorite kind of money? Sand dollars.

Why don’t whales eat clowns? They taste funny.

What do you call a whale who works out? A gym-narwhal.

How do whales stay in touch? With their shell phones.

What’s a whale’s favorite place to rest? In a water bed.

Why was the whale so good at school? He was above sea-level.

What do you call a whale from Texas? A Gulf-stream cowboy.

How do whales read bedtime stories? They whale them out.

What’s a whale’s favorite James Bond movie? License to Krill.

Why don’t whales like basketball? They’re afraid of the net.

What do you call a sophisticated whale? A swale.

Why did the whale blush? It saw the ocean’s bottom.

What do you call a whale magician? A hocus-porpoise.

How do whales keep their skin smooth? With ocean lotion.

What’s a whale’s favorite kind of music? Orca-n roll.

Why did the whale join the navy? He wanted to sea the world.

What do you call a whale detective? Sherlock Holmes.

How do whales get to school? On the school squid.

What’s a whale’s favorite snack? Krill crackers and cheese.

Why did the whale go to therapy? To address his porpoise in life.

What’s a whale’s favorite nursery rhyme? Little Squid Peep.

Why was the whale so punctual? He didn’t want to miss the high tide.

What do you call a whale with a fast food job? A fry-whale.

How do whales like their news? In brief squirts.

What’s a whale’s favorite kind of joke? Something with a deep sense of porpoise.

Why did the whale stop playing cards? He was tired of fishing for compliments.

What do you call a whale who’s a movie star? A big splash on screen.

Why did the whale join the circus? He had a flair for the dramatic sea.

What’s a whale’s favorite exercise? The blowhole stretch.

How do whales cheer on their team? They wave their fins.

What’s a whale’s favorite science fiction book? Moby Click.

Why did the whale get an award? For being outstanding in his field… of seaweed!

Whale Jokes For Adults

Whale Jokes For Adults

Whales don’t date octopuses; they can’t handle the clinginess.

At the bar, a whale says, “I’ll have a water. I’m driving a submarine tonight.”

A whale walks into a casino, bets it all on a single game of poker, and loses. Talk about high stakes!

Why don’t whales gamble? Too much at sea.

What’s a whale’s favorite pick-up line? “Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I swim by again?”

Why don’t whales get married? They can’t wade through the commitment.

A whale says to his buddy, “I’m feeling blue.” His buddy replies, “With that size, you look more like a humpback.”

Why was the whale a good investor? He liked to play the sturgeon market.

What do you call a whale with sophisticated taste? Cultured Pearl.

Why don’t whales use email? They’re afraid of spam and phishing attempts.

A whale tells his therapist, “I just can’t seem to find my porpoise.”

Why don’t whales get into politics? They’re tired of the current flow.

What’s a whale’s favorite kind of party? A tailgate.

Why did the whale get out of the stock market? Too much krill volatility.

A whale in a bar says, “I’ll have a coral on the rocks.”

Why did the whale join a band? He had a great orca-stral presence.

What’s a whale’s least favorite movie? “Gone with the Wind”—they can’t stand air pollution.

Why did the whale break up with the submarine? It was too sub-merged in work.

A whale says to his date, “You have the most beautiful blubber I’ve ever seen.”

Why don’t whales like fast food? It causes a fluke in their diet.

A whale complains at a restaurant, “This plankton is a bit too salty for my taste.”

Why did the whale get a promotion? He was outstanding in his field of sea-ology.

What’s a whale’s favorite line at the gym? “I’m here to krill it.”

Why was the whale so good at hide and seek? He always found a good plaice to hide.

A whale says to his friend, “I’m not fat, I’m just big-boned.”

Why don’t whales get claustrophobic? Because they’ve got plenty of space in the ocean.

What’s a whale’s favorite kind of humor? Dry, surprisingly.

Why did the whale refuse the cocktail? He didn’t want to get tanked.

A whale tells his friend, “I’m not a big fan of seafood. I prefer to keep my friends close and my anemones closer.”

Why did the whale go to the moon? He wanted to see the space krill.

Fat Whale Jokes

Fat Whale Jokes

Why do whales sing? Because talk radio doesn’t work underwater.

What did one ocean say to the overweight whale? “Nothing, it just waved.”

How do you throw a party for a fat whale? You planet.

Why don’t fat whales hide? They can’t find a reef big enough.

What’s a fat whale’s favorite game? Swallow the leader.

How do fat whales stay informed? They watch the whale-ther channel.

Why did the fat whale get a job? To make a bigger splash in life.

What’s a fat whale’s favorite hobby? Belly flopping.

Why don’t fat whales use elevators? They’re scared of reaching new depths.

What do fat whales do at the beach? They beachcomb for compliments.

How do fat whales travel? On a cruise ship, for the buffet.

Why did the fat whale get invited to parties? He was a heavy hitter.

What’s a fat whale’s life motto? “Eat, sleep, breach, repeat.”

Why did the fat whale join the gym? To get his flukes in shape.

How do fat whales diet? They cut out the sea-food.

What do you call a fat whale? An immersible.

Why did the fat whale love astrology? He had a whale of a horoscope.

What’s a fat whale’s favorite instrument? The tuba, for its round sound.

Why do fat whales make good comedians? They always bring the belly laughs.

How do fat whales greet each other? “Long time no sea.”

Why did the fat whale get on the seesaw? He wanted to scale back.

What’s a fat whale’s favorite movie? “Free Willy,” for the escape scenes.

Why don’t fat whales play hide and seek? Even the ocean isn’t big enough to hide them.

What’s a fat whale’s favorite exercise? The blubber burn.

Why did the fat whale sit on the boat? He wanted to make it a submarine.

How do fat whales cheer themselves up? They tell themselves they’re just big-boned.

Why did the fat whale stop playing football? He kept getting beached.

What’s a fat whale’s favorite type of story? A tall tail.

Why did the fat whale love the buffet? It was all-you-can-eat krill.

How do fat whales fight? They throw their weight around.

Whale Jokes One Liners

Whales are terrible at hide and seek; they always blubber their hiding spot.

I asked a whale for the time; he said it’s half past the krill.

Never trust a whale to keep a secret; they’re too big to keep anything under wraps.

Whales don’t go to college; they already have enough degrees in sea-ology.

I tried to weigh a whale once; the scale just waved goodbye.

Whales always sing off-key; because they can’t tuna fish.

I bought a whale a drink; now he’s my drinking krill.

Whales are bad at math; they can’t fit the numbers into their scales.

A whale’s favorite place to shop is the size-sea store.

Whales don’t use perfume; they prefer eau de ocean.

I told a whale a joke; he said it was a fluke.

Whales don’t play football; they’re afraid of the tackle box.

A whale’s favorite kind of chip? Krill and vinegar.

Whales don’t get haircuts; they’re afraid of the snip tide.

Whales don’t like fast food; they can’t catch it.

A whale’s favorite dance move? The tail spin.

Whales don’t use ovens; they prefer to grill on the beach.

Whales never get lost; they just follow the current events.

Whales don’t get in hot water; they prefer it salty and cold.

A whale’s favorite dessert? Jellyfish and scream.

Whales don’t play darts; they can’t stand the point.

Whales don’t like selfies; they can’t find a phone with a wide enough lens.

Whales don’t watch TV; they watch sea-ries.

Whales don’t use bookmarks; they just flipper through the pages.

Whales don’t like cooking shows; they can’t stand the heat in the kitchen.

Whales don’t play poker; they can’t handle the chips.

Whales don’t use GPS; they navigate by starfish.

Whales don’t like elevators; they’re not up to that level.

Whales don’t drink coffee; they’re already above sea level.

Whales don’t use pens; they prefer to ink it over.

Knock Knock Whale Jokes

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Whale. Whale who? Whale you let me in, it’s wet out here!

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Ocean. Ocean who? Ocean you glad I didn’t say whale again?

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Orca. Orca who? Orca you going to open the door or what?

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Sea. Sea who? Sea you later, I’m swimming away!

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Dolphin. Dolphin who? Dolphinately time for you to let me in!

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Water. Water who? Water you waiting for, let’s go swimming!

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Squid. Squid who? Squid you not, I’m friends with a whale!

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Fish. Fish who? Fish you were here to see this whale of a tale!

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Salt. Salt who? Salt-water you thinking, not recognizing me?

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Harbor. Harbor who? Harbor you not heard these jokes before?

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Plankton. Plankton who? Plankton time to let me in, buddy!

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Tide. Tide who? Tide to meet you, can I come in?

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Seaweed. Seaweed who? Seaweed you at the beach, right?

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Krill. Krill who? Krill you be my friend?

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Coral. Coral who? Coral you going to ask me in or what?

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Moby. Moby who? Moby I’ll tell you if you open the door.

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Surf. Surf who? Surfing time you answered the door!

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Blubber. Blubber who? Blubbering with excitement to see you!

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Fin. Fin who? Fin-tastic to meet you, neighbor!

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Porpoise. Porpoise who? Porpoise-fully here to make you smile!

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Beluga. Beluga who? Beluga me, I’ve got a whale of a joke!

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Humpback. Humpback who? Humpback your things, we’re going on an adventure!

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Gill. Gill who? Gill you let me in if I promise not to splash?

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Anchor. Anchor who? Anchor-age you to laugh at this joke!

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Ship. Ship who? Shipshape and ready to party!

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Marlin. Marlin who? Marlin your business, just open the door!

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Nautical. Nautical who? Nautical you later if you don’t answer now!

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Shrimp. Shrimp who? Shrimp and simple, I need to come in!

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Eel. Eel who? Eel be waiting if you don’t hurry up!

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Barnacle. Barnacle who? Barnacle on your door until you let me in!

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