Flat earth jokes serve as a light-hearted battleground where science and conspiracy amusingly clash. Ever stumbled upon a joke so absurd, it spins your world—flat or not?
These jests navigate the quirky realm of flat earth theories, poking fun at the spherical certainty we’ve all come to know. With a blend of satire and whimsy, they invite everyone to chuckle over the edges of our understanding.
Who knew debunking or defending the geometry of our planet could be so entertaining? Dive into a universe where humor flattens the curve of debate, and let’s explore the edge together—just don’t fall off!
Funny Flat Earth Jokes
Why don’t flat earthers ever play soccer? They can’t handle the globe.
A flat earther’s biggest fear? Sphere itself.
Flat earthers have a round table meeting. They couldn’t find any corners to sit in.
Why did the flat earther cross the road? To prove it wasn’t round.
What do you call a flat earth seminar? A global gathering.
How do flat earthers travel? On a plane.
Why are maps flat? To give flat earthers something to believe in.
What’s a flat earther’s favorite pizza? Plain and flat, with no sphere of toppings.
How do you throw a space party? You planet with flat earthers.
Why don’t flat earthers believe in gravity? They can’t seem to come around to it.
What do flat earthers and phones have in common? No roaming charges.
Why can’t flat earthers be real estate agents? They can’t sell globes.
Flat earthers don’t tell lies. They just spread the flat.
Why are flat earth jokes so funny? They never fall flat.
What’s a flat earther’s favorite movie? “Around the World in 80 Days” is too unbelievable.
How do flat earthers like their steaks? On the rare side of the moon.
Why do flat earthers stay calm? Nothing gets under their globe.
What’s a flat earther’s least favorite music? Anything with a good beat round it.
Why was the flat earther’s book so thin? It only had one point of view.
What do you get when you cross a flat earther with a scientist? A heated debate on a cool plane.
How do flat earthers solve problems? They don’t go around them.
What’s a flat earther’s favorite game? Not spinning the bottle.
Why do flat earthers avoid bars? They can’t handle the rounds.
How do flat earthers stay fit? By running to the edge and back.
Why did the flat earther break up with his girlfriend? She said he needed more dimension in his life.
Why do flat earthers hate basketball? It’s all about getting around the opponent.
What did the flat earther say at the beach? “Look at that vast flat sea.”
How do you confuse a flat earther? Show them a world map and a globe.
What do flat earthers and pancakes have in common? Both are flat-out delicious.
Why don’t flat earthers like to ski? Too afraid of going downhill.
What’s a flat earther’s favorite type of research? Flat files.
Why are flat earth debates so intense? Because it’s a matter of plane facts.
What’s a flat earther’s life motto? Keep it flat, simple, and don’t roll with the punches.
Why did the flat earther get kicked out of the debate? He couldn’t face the round arguments.
How do flat earthers end a prayer? Flat be with you.
Why did the flat earther stay home? He heard travel broadens the mind.
What do you call a well-educated flat earther? A paradox.
Why don’t flat earthers like globes? They can’t handle the truth.
What’s a flat earther’s biggest challenge? Overcoming the curve of learning.
Why did the flat earther refuse the drink? It was on the house, and he didn’t believe in elevation.
Popular Flat Earth Jokes
Why do flat Earthers fear water? They’re scared of reaching the edge and dropping off!
Flat Earth Society members don’t fear climate change because they think it’s just the world’s edge heating up.
Friend 1: “I joined a flat Earth club!” Friend 2: “Really? How many members?” Friend 1: “Oh, we have members all around the globe.”
Believing the Earth is flat is like ordering a round pizza and thinking it’s a square meal.
Jokes about the flat Earth fall flat unless you believe in edgy humor.
Astronauts can’t tell flat Earth jokes in space. There’s no atmosphere!
Cats would have pushed everything off the edge if the Earth were flat.
Flat Earthers struggle with social media. They can’t get around to following anyone.
If you date a flat Earther, you’ll never get around to meeting their world.
Scientists got bored of arguing with flat Earthers. They realized it’s pointless.
At flat Earth conferences, everyone’s on edge.
Compass makers secretly love flat Earthers. They always end up going in circles.
Never play hide and seek with a flat Earther. They believe everyone hides around the corner.
Mountains are just speed bumps for flat Earthers.
Flat Earth belief is like bad pizza – even when it’s round, they say it’s flat.
What’s a flat Earther’s biggest fear at sea? Reaching the “End of the World” sign!
Magellan once said, “I’ll sail around the world!” Flat Earthers: “Yeah, right, and I’m Santa Claus.”
Flat Earthers don’t like global warming talks. They say it makes the ice walls melt.
Pilots love flat Earthers. They never ask for window seats.
Flat Earthers always pack light. They’re afraid of tipping the edge.
In a flat world, every road trip could be your last. Watch out for the sign: “End of the Earth 10 miles.”
Basketball is confusing for flat Earthers. They don’t get how we can dribble around a sphere.
Flat Earthers’ favorite game? Not globe-trotting, for sure.
When flat Earthers see a world map: “Finally, some accurate representation!”
Sailing schools avoid flat Earth theory. Too many students feared falling off the course.
A flat Earther’s favorite book? “Around the World in Zero Days.”
GPS is a conspiracy to flat Earthers. They use treasure maps instead.
Flat Earthers hate beach balls. Too round and misleading.
When asked about the horizon, a flat Earther said, “It’s the end of the line.”
Flat Earthers don’t skydive. They’re afraid of jumping off the planet.
Flat Earth One Liners
Flat Earthers have the best parties; they take it to the edge.
Love is like the Earth to flat Earthers: unbelievably flat.
Globes are flat Earthers’ biggest fear—rounded and wrong.
Maps are flat Earthers’ version of reality TV.
Flat Earth theory: because gravity is too mainstream.
For flat Earthers, every trip is a potential cliffhanger.
Round pizzas are flat Earthers’ only exception.
Flat Earthers don’t do round tables; too much like globes.
“Keep it flat,” the flat Earther toasted.
Globetrotting? More like map meandering, say flat Earthers.
Flat Earthers don’t back down—they edge away.
Sunrise and sunset: just Earth’s screen saver to flat Earthers.
Flat Earthers’ favorite shape? Line. End of story.
To flat Earthers, globe trotters are just living a lie.
Flat Earthers say to compasses: “Don’t circle around the point.”
For a flat Earther, every ocean voyage could be overboard.
Flat Earthers don’t get lost; they hit the wall.
Space programs are just high-budget fiction to flat Earthers.
Flat Earthers’ favorite workout? Edge push-ups.
Flat Earthers play soccer strictly for the flat field.
“Flat as the Earth” beats “flat as a pancake” any day.
Flat Earthers’ diets exclude globe grapes; too spherical.
To flat Earthers, “global” awareness is just a flat-out lie.
Flat Earthers’ boats never sail into the sunset—they might fall off.
Flat Earthers’ favorite holiday? April Fool’s, when everyone gets the joke.
According to flat Earthers, Earth doesn’t have a point.
Flat Earthers’ maps have no scale—just edges.
Flat Earthers do yoga to stay grounded, not global.
Every flat Earther’s dream vacation? A trip around the world—sideways.
Flat Earthers’ favorite math? Plane geometry, obviously.
“If Earth is Flat” Jokes
If Earth is flat, then every geography class is a lie-detector test.
If Earth is flat, do we just avoid the edge like it’s Monday?
If Earth is flat, are all world tours just straight lines?
If Earth is flat, is Mount Everest just a bump on the road?
If Earth is flat, is GPS just playing an elaborate game of “don’t fall off”?
If Earth is flat, do waterfalls at the edge go into space?
If Earth is flat, are satellite dishes just for show?
If Earth is flat, are all globes just stress balls?
If Earth is flat, do we call astronauts space hikers?
If Earth is flat, is the Bermuda Triangle just the exit door?
If Earth is flat, do oceans just end with a “Beware: Wet Floor” sign?
If Earth is flat, are all maps just drawn to scale?
If Earth is flat, are rainbows just light bending out of fear?
If Earth is flat, is the horizon just the end of the level?
If Earth is flat, are sunsets just the sun hiding under the bed?
If Earth is flat, do birds get scared of flying too high and seeing the bottom?
If Earth is flat, is every flight a low-altitude flight?
If Earth is flat, are plate tectonics just table manners?
If Earth is flat, is the Mariana Trench just a scratch?
If Earth is flat, do we measure its thickness for its age?
If Earth is flat, are polar expeditions just corner finding missions?
If Earth is flat, is gravity just a myth like dragons?
If Earth is flat, are all trips around the world just big circles?
If Earth is flat, is the equator just the belt holding it all together?
If Earth is flat, are mountain climbers just people who hate flatness?
If Earth is flat, is the international date line just a long queue?
If Earth is flat, do we live in fear of flipping like a pancake?
If Earth is flat, are all space photos just high-angle selfies?
If Earth is flat, is the Arctic just the center of the disc?
If Earth is flat, are all earthworms just afraid of heights?
