It’s a universal quest for that spark of joy, that unexpected twist of words that ignites laughter.
“Did you hear about” jokes stand as a testament to humor’s timeless appeal, weaving simplicity and wit into a single line capable of breaking the ice or brightening a day.
But finding those gems among the endless sea of punchlines? That’s where the real challenge lies.
This article dives deep into the art of crafting and appreciating these jokes, aiming to equip you with the knack for spotting that perfect blend of humor and wordplay.
By varying our sentence structure and using language that resonates, we invite you on a journey to not just read jokes, but to feel the laughter they’re meant to inspire.
Ready to explore the world of “Did you hear about” jokes? Let’s uncover the secret to what makes them tick, and perhaps, find a few laughs along the way.
Funny “Did You Hear About” Jokes
Did you hear about the mathematician who’s afraid of negative numbers? He’ll stop at nothing to avoid them.
Have you heard about the new restaurant called Karma? There’s no menu – you get what you deserve.
Did you know about the claustrophobic astronaut? He just needed a little space.
Heard about the paper business? It folded.
Know why the bicycle couldn’t stand up by itself? It was two-tired.
Ever hear about the light bulb who got a job? It was delighted.
Did you hear about the guy who invented Lifesavers? He made a mint.
Heard about the fire at the circus? It was intense.
Did you hear about the cheese factory that exploded? Left nothing but de-brie.
Know about the cross-eyed teacher? He couldn’t control his pupils.
Heard about the kidnapping at the playground? They woke up.
Did you hear about the calendar thief? He got 12 months; they say his days are numbered.
Have you heard about the pencil with two erasers? It was pointless.
Did you hear about the guy who stole a calendar? He got 12 months.
Know about the elevator that broke down? It was wrong on so many levels.
Heard about the guy who fell into an upholstery machine? He’s fully recovered.
Did you hear about the bed bugs who fell in love? They’re getting married in the spring.
Know why the tomato turned red? It saw the salad dressing.
Heard about the atom that lost an electron? It was charged with battery.
Did you hear about the guy who quit his job at the shoe recycling plant? It was sole-destroying.
Have you heard about the scarecrow who won an award? He was outstanding in his field.
Did you hear about the lazy kangaroo? It was a pouch potato.
Know about the guy who got hit by the same bike every day? It was a vicious cycle.
Heard about the fish that performs operations? It’s a sturgeon.
Did you hear about the magic tractor? It turned into a field.
Know why the golfer brought two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole in one.
Heard about the skunk who went to court? He appealed his scent-ence.
Did you hear about the computer that got cold? It left its Windows open.
Have you heard about the cow in space? It was an udder galaxy.
Did you hear about the forgetful knight? He lost his knightly duties.
Know why the scarecrow got promoted? He was outstanding in his field.
Heard about the broken pencil? It was pointless.
Did you hear about the snowman who got a job? He was flaky but cool.
Know about the duck that was arrested? It was selling quack.
Heard about the new broom? It’s sweeping the nation.
Did you hear about the cat who swallowed a ball of yarn? She had mittens.
Have you heard about the butter that got into an argument? It wouldn’t spread the rumor.
Did you hear about the egg that cracked up? It wasn’t all it was cracked up to be.
Know about the book on anti-gravity? It’s impossible to put down.
Heard about the roof? Never mind, it’s over your head.
“Did you Hear About” Math Jokes
Did you hear about the mathematician who’s afraid of fractions? He couldn’t take a part of it.
Know why six was afraid of seven? Because 7 8 (ate) 9!
Ever hear about the constipated mathematician? He worked it out with a pencil.
Heard about the mathematician who hates negative numbers? He will stop at nothing to avoid them.
Did you hear about the circle’s vacation? It went around the world.
Know why the equal sign broke up with the inequality? They weren’t right for each other.
Ever hear why the obtuse angle went to the beach? It was over 90 degrees.
Heard about the adventurous number? It always went off the beaten path.
Did you hear about the number that got sick? It had a bad case of the flu-ents.
Know why the algebra book looked sad? It had too many problems.
Ever hear about the statistician who drowned crossing the river? It was three feet deep, on average.
Heard about the geometry book? It’s full of life’s angles.
Did you hear about the mathematician’s plant? It grew square roots.
Know why the numbers went to school? To improve their figures.
Ever hear about the mathematician who was also a chef? He made Pi.
Heard about the paranoid number? It felt like someone was always counting on it.
Did you hear about the numeral without friends? It was a prime number.
Know why the zero broke up with the eight? It was too tight.
Ever hear about the math test that was a crime scene? All the problems were solved.
Heard about the fraction that went to the doctor? It needed to be simplified.
Did you hear about the math student who was a farmer? He made square meals a day.
Know why the calculator was happy? It felt like it finally added up.
Ever hear about the optimistic angle? It always looked acute.
Heard about the math book that went on an adventure? It found its X.
Did you hear about the geometry class that went to the amusement park? They had a great time with the roller-coaster.
Know why the polynomial broke up with the monomial? It wanted more terms.
Ever hear about the mathematician who loved winter? He was into snow figures.
Heard about the algebra variable that went to Hollywood? It became a star.
Did you hear about the math problem that went viral? It was highly contagious.
Know why the integer was unhappy at the party? It couldn’t find its plus one.
“Did you Hear About” Dad Jokes
Did you hear about the guy who invented the knock-knock joke? He won the “no-bell” prize.
Know what you call fake spaghetti? An impasta.
Ever hear about the rooftop that couldn’t stop bragging? It was through the roof.
Heard about the shoe made of banana peels? It was a slipper.
Did you hear about the belt made of watches? It was a waist of time.
Know why the broom was late? It over-swept.
Ever hear about the lazy coin? It hardly made any cents.
Heard about the elevator that tells jokes? It’s uplifting.
Did you hear about the guy who got hit by a can of soda? He was lucky it was a soft drink.
Know why the computer went to the doctor? It had a virus.
Ever hear about the scarecrow who got promoted? He was outstanding in his field.
Heard about the guy who lost his left side? He’s all right now.
Did you hear about the calendar thief? His days are numbered.
Know why the bicycle couldn’t stand up by itself? It was two-tired.
Ever hear about the butter that got into an argument? It wouldn’t spread the rumor.
Heard about the guy who invented the door knocker? He got a no-bell prize.
Did you hear about the guy who stole a lamp? He got a bright idea.
Know why the picture went to jail? It was framed.
Ever hear about the pencil with two erasers? It was pointless.
Heard about the guy who ate a clock? It was time-consuming.
Did you hear about the graveyard? People are dying to get in there.
Know why the orange stopped? It ran out of juice.
Ever hear about the cow that jumped over the barbed wire? It was an udder catastrophe.
Heard about the fish that performs operations? It’s a sturgeon.
Did you hear about the magician who lost his magic? He vanished into thin air.
Know why the golfer brought two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole in one.
Ever hear about the book on anti-gravity? It’s impossible to put down.
Heard about the new broom? It’s sweeping the nation.
Did you hear about the cat who swallowed a ball of yarn? She had mittens.
Know why the scarecrow won an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.
Did you Hear About Jokes One Liners
Did you hear about the invisible man who married an invisible woman? Their kids were nothing to look at either.
Know about the guy who stole a calendar? He got 12 months.
Ever hear about the broken pencil? Forget it; it’s pointless.
Heard about the claustrophobic astronaut? He just needed a little space.
Did you hear about the cheese factory explosion? De-brie was everywhere.
Know why the coffee filed a police report? It got mugged.
Ever hear about the restaurant on the moon? Great food, no atmosphere.
Heard about the new corduroy pillows? They’re making headlines.
Did you hear about the kidnapping at school? It’s fine, he woke up.
Know why the math book looked sad? Because it had too many problems.
Ever hear about the butcher who backed into his meat grinder? He got a little behind in his work.
Heard about the guy who got hit with a can of soda? He was lucky it was a soft drink.
Did you hear about the scarecrow who won an award? He was outstanding in his field.
Know why the bicycle couldn’t stand up by itself? It was two-tired.
Ever hear about the cross-eyed teacher? She couldn’t control her pupils.
Heard about the duck that loves fireworks? He’s a firequacker.
Did you hear about the mathematician who’s afraid of negative numbers? He’ll stop at nothing to avoid them.
Know why the golfer brought two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole in one.
Ever hear about the guy who invented the knock-knock joke? He won the “no-bell” prize.
Heard about the elevator that tells jokes? It’s uplifting.
Did you hear about the circus fire? It was in tents.
Know why the nose couldn’t be 12 inches long? Because then it would be a foot.
Ever hear about the fire at the shoe factory? 10,000 soles were lost.
Heard about the guy who played piano in a band called “The Hinges”? Every time they played, he was off the hook.
Did you hear about the guy who dipped his testicles in glitter? Pretty nuts, right?
Know why the skeleton didn’t go to the party? He had no body to go with.
Ever hear about the guy who threw his clock out the window? He wanted to see time fly.
Heard about the termite who walked into a bar and asked, “Is the bar tender here?”
Did you hear about the fish that knows karate? He’s a Koi-kondo expert.
Know why the computer went to therapy? It had too many bits and bytes.
