Zombie Jokes

Zombie Jokes – Undead Humor for Living Souls

Zombies, those brain-hungry creatures of the night, have long haunted our nightmares. But who said they couldn’t tickle our funny bones too? Delving into the world of zombie jokes, we uncover a treasure trove of humor that’s as infectious as a zombie bite.

Why do zombies seem to have such a knack for comedy? Maybe it’s their relentless pursuit of brains, or perhaps it’s the irony of the living dead finding humor in the quirks of life. So, what happens when you cross a zombie with a sense of humor?

You get a collection of jokes that are drop-dead hilarious! Ready to unearth some rib-tickling, brain-teasing humor? Let’s dive deep into the world of zombie comedy, where the undead come alive with laughter. And remember, it’s all in good fun; no zombies were harmed in the making of these jokes!

Funny Zombie Jokes

Funny Zombie Jokes

Why did the zombie join a band? He wanted to play the dead drums!

Zombies’ favorite mode of transport? Dead-end streets.

What’s a zombie’s favorite bean? Human bean.

Why did the zombie get a ticket? Dead-stop in a no-parking zone!

Zombies at a restaurant? “Table for two, and a snack to go!”

A zombie’s favorite dessert? Ice scream.

Why did the zombie refuse the computer? He feared the byte!

Zombie’s favorite sport? Deadlifting.

What’s a zombie’s favorite dance? The jitterbug.

Why did the zombie visit school? To improve his deaducation!

A zombie’s favorite drink? Decaffeinated coffee.

Why did the zombie visit the library? He wanted a bite of literature.

Zombie’s favorite social media? Deadbook.

Why did the zombie get glasses? To look for fresh bites better!

What’s a zombie’s favorite cereal? Frosted Flakes with extra brains.

A zombie’s favorite place? Dead Sea.

Why did the zombie go to the beach? He wanted some salt on his food!

Zombie’s favorite song? “Stayin’ Alive.”

Why did the zombie become a chef? He loved gourmet brains!

Zombie’s favorite game? Hide and shriek.

Why did the zombie join the circus? He wanted to be a dead-defying act!

Zombie’s favorite candy? Braindrops.

Why did the zombie go to the dentist? He had a decaying tooth!

Zombie’s favorite movie? “Dead Men Don’t Wear Plaid.”

Why did the zombie become a detective? He loved digging up dirt!

Zombie’s favorite exercise? Deadlifts.

Why did the zombie go to the bank? To save his dead presidents!

Zombie’s favorite fruit? Blood oranges.

Why did the zombie get promoted? He was dead-set on success!

Zombie’s favorite holiday? Halloween, of course!

Why did the zombie become a gardener? He had a green thumb.

Zombie’s favorite type of music? Dead metal.

Why did the zombie go to the doctor? He felt lifeless!

Zombie’s favorite instrument? Dead drums.

Why did the zombie visit the art gallery? He loved still life paintings!

Zombie’s favorite shoe brand? Deadstock.

Why did the zombie become a poet? He had a way with dead metaphors!

Zombie’s favorite weather? Dead calm.

Why did the zombie become a baker? He kneaded the dough!

Zombie’s favorite day of the week? Moanday.

Zombie Jokes for kids

Zombie Jokes for kids

Why did the zombie go to school? He wanted to eat some teacher’s brains!

What’s a zombie’s favorite snack? Finger foods.

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Zombie. Zombie who? Zombies are coming, better run!

How do zombies like their eggs? Terri-fried!

What did the zombie say to his friend? “You crack me up!”

Why did the zombie bring a spoon to the game? He wanted to eat the brains out!

What do you call a zombie with lots of kids? A deadbeat dad.

How do zombies flirt? “I’m dead over heels for you!”

What’s a zombie’s favorite game? Freeze tag.

Why did the zombie go on a diet? Too much junk in the tomb!

What did the zombie’s mom say? “Eat your veggies, not your friends!”

Why was the zombie so calm? He had dead nerves.

What’s a zombie’s favorite vegetable? Head lettuce.

Why did the zombie join the circus? He was a dead ringer for a clown!

How do zombies cheer for their team? “Go, ghouls, go!”

What did the little zombie want for his birthday? A dead teddy bear.

Why did the zombie go to the beach? He wanted some sand-witches!

What’s a zombie’s favorite bath toy? A rubber tomb.

Why did the zombie stay home from the party? He felt rotten.

What do you call a zombie’s dog? A terror-ier.

Why did the zombie go to the library? He wanted a bite of knowledge.

What’s a zombie’s favorite fruit? Nectarines from the graveyard.

Why did the zombie get a timeout? He wouldn’t stop dead-behaving!

What do you call a zombie’s laugh? A “ne-cackle-crosis.”

Why did the zombie go to the doctor? He had a deadache.

What’s a zombie’s favorite song? “If you’re scary and you know it, clap your hands!”

Why did the zombie get glasses? To look dead-sharp!

What did the zombie say during lunch? “Pass the brain dressing!”

Why did the zombie go to the moon? He wanted space brains!

What’s a zombie’s favorite bedtime story? “Goodnight, Ghoul.”

Zombie Apocalypse Jokes

Zombie Apocalypse Jokes

Why did the zombie apocalypse fail? Zombies lacked brainpower!

During a zombie apocalypse, what’s the safest place? Inside a joke book.

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Apocalypse. Apocalypse who? A-poca-lips are what zombies aim for!

How do zombies organize an apocalypse? They plan a byte!

What’s a zombie’s favorite apocalypse activity? A brainstorm session.

Why did the zombie bring sunscreen to the apocalypse? He didn’t want to roast while feasting!

What’s the zombie apocalypse motto? “Eat brains, not grains!”

How do zombies start an apocalypse? With a byte and a giggle.

Why did the zombie go to the bank during the apocalypse? To save his dead presidents!

What’s a zombie’s favorite apocalypse movie? “Dawn of the Dining Dead.”

Why did the zombie join the apocalypse gym? To get dead fit!

What did the zombie say at the apocalypse party? “This is a no-brainer!”

Why did the zombie bring a map to the apocalypse? He didn’t want to lose his head!

How do zombies send apocalypse invitations? Via the dead mail.

Why did the zombie go to the apocalypse school? To improve his deaducation!

What’s a zombie’s favorite apocalypse snack? Brain chips and dip.

Why did the zombie become an apocalypse chef? He loved gourmet end-of-the-world dishes!

What’s a zombie’s favorite apocalypse song? “It’s the end of the world as we know it, and I feel bite!”

Why did the zombie bring a flashlight to the apocalypse? To find the light snacks!

What did the zombie say during the apocalypse race? “I’m dead last!”

Why did the zombie go to the apocalypse store? He heard there was a brain sale!

What’s a zombie’s favorite apocalypse game? “Hide and shriek!”

Why did the zombie bring a suitcase to the apocalypse? He wanted to pack some bites!

What did the zombie say at the apocalypse dance? “I’ve got dead moves!”

Why did the zombie go to the apocalypse spa? He needed a dead sea mud mask!

What’s a zombie’s favorite apocalypse drink? A brain smoothie.

Why did the zombie bring a ladder to the apocalypse? He heard brains were on the top shelf!

What did the zombie say at the apocalypse picnic? “Pass the brain salad!”

Why did the zombie go to the apocalypse library? He wanted a bite of post-apocalyptic literature!

What’s a zombie’s favorite apocalypse dessert? Brainberry pie.

Zombie Knock Knock Jokes

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Zombie. Zombie who? Zombie ready to laugh out loud?

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Dead. Dead who? Dead you hear about the zombie comedy show?

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Brain. Brain who? Brain some friends, the more the scarier!

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Ghoul. Ghoul who? Ghoul times ahead with these jokes!

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Bite. Bite who? Bite me, these jokes are hilarious!

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Tomb. Tomb who? Tomb many zombie jokes, can’t stop laughing!

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Decay. Decay who? Decay-ke is ready, want a slice?

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Rotten. Rotten who? Rotten luck, it’s another zombie joke!

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Mummy. Mummy who? Mummy said zombies can be funny too!

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Eerie. Eerie who? Eerie-sistible jokes coming your way!

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Grave. Grave who? Grave reviews for these zombie jokes!

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Shriek. Shriek who? Shriek with laughter, here comes another!

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Undead. Undead who? Undead and loving these jokes!

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Coffin. Coffin who? Coffin from laughing so hard!

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Moan. Moan who? Moan and groan, these jokes are too funny!

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Ghastly. Ghastly who? Ghastly got more jokes up my sleeve!

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Spook. Spook who? Spook too soon, another joke’s coming!

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Haunt. Haunt who? Haunt you glad we have these jokes?

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Scare. Scare who? Scare-d you didn’t I? Just kidding!

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Creep. Creep who? Creep it up, these jokes are a hit!

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Boo. Boo who? Boo-hoo, don’t cry, more jokes are coming!

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Fang. Fang who? Fang-tastic jokes, right?

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Howl. Howl who? Howl you like another joke?

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Cackle. Cackle who? Cackle up, it’s joke time!

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Witch. Witch who? Witch one of these jokes is your favorite?

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Gory. Gory who? Gory details aside, these jokes are fun!

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Crypt. Crypt who? Crypt-ic messages lead to more jokes!

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Phantom. Phantom who? Phantom of the opera loves these jokes!

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Specter. Specter who? Specter-acular jokes for everyone!

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Shadow. Shadow who? Shadow of doubt, these are the best jokes!

Zombie Jokes One Iiners

Zombies love fast food; especially the ones that run!

Brain food is a zombie’s idea of a balanced diet.

Zombies don’t need coffee; they’re already dead awake.

For zombies, every day is a no-brainer.

Zombies’ favorite shampoo? Head & Shoulders, obviously.

Zombies make terrible secret agents; they’re too dead giveaway.

Why did the zombie go vegan? He wanted grain, not brains!

Zombies’ favorite shop? Dead Bath & Beyond.

Zombies don’t play hide and seek; they always rot and reveal.

In a zombie world, every joke is a rib-tickler.

Zombies’ favorite exercise? Deadlifts, of course.

Zombies don’t need watches; they’re timeless.

Why do zombies love school? Brainstorming sessions!

Zombies’ favorite jeans? Ripped, naturally.

Zombies don’t need alarms; they’re up at the crack of dawn… of the dead.

Zombies’ favorite game? Musical tombstones.

Why do zombies avoid debates? They can’t pick a side; they want all of you!

Zombies’ favorite candy? Life Savers.

Zombies make terrible comedians; their jokes are dead on arrival.

Why do zombies love computers? They can’t resist the byte.

Zombies’ favorite holiday? Thanks-gnawing.

Zombies don’t need mirrors; they’re drop-dead gorgeous.

Why do zombies love winter? Cold hands, undead heart.

Zombies’ favorite song? “Dead or Alive.”

Zombies don’t play cards; they always fold under pressure.

Why do zombies avoid the gym? Dead weight issues.

Zombies’ favorite drink? A Bloody Mary, hold the Mary.

Zombies don’t need sunscreen; they love the dead heat.

Why do zombies avoid math? Too many problems to digest.

Zombies’ favorite instrument? The organ, naturally.

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